My Enemy :(

My enemy is back from a vacation.. She just doesn’t allow me to be happy.. I know she enjoys every time I crib, every time I am defeated. Not because I lost but because I dint try and she is the reason I dint try because she prevents me from doing everything I like.. she is like a wall.. a minefield. no she is worse than that she is always pulling me down ,underestimating me…sucking my confidence dry.. telling me that I am worthless.. telling that I can be dead if I did that.. she is there to tell me that I cant! every time I think I can..I hate her but cant get rid of her .. I Don’t know what to do ..i talked about her with my friends and with everybody… she even made me suspect my best friend she made me not to trust anybody.. she makes me think twice before I rev my bike over 100kmph.. I know she is slowly ruining my life yet I cant do anything.I am letting her kill myself. So I have decided that I WANT TO KILL HER or atleast chase her out of my life .. I know its drastic but if she is alive I will die a slow death..i don’t want to die..i wan to live happily so it’s a neccasity.. if she is alive I cant be happy..but how will I do it..i don’t know how where but I have to do it somehow.. Please help me guys I want her dead in anyway possible.. I cant do it alone. Consider this as my sincere request.. most of you guys would know her.. one of my friends told me the best way to kill her would be to face her instead of running away so I took her on my bike at the stroke of midnight and I drove like possed for 5 kms in a bad road then I stopped. Lokked back to see if she had fallen down somewhere but she hadn’t she was there whatever I did she would never go away she was always there…she had again won …then I realized she made me stop the bike when I actually wanted to go faster but then I realized there was huge hole ahead and If I would not have stopped I would be dead.I am alive because of the person whom I wanted to kill.. I think my enemy is a necessary evil.. oh by the by her name is fear